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Love Crosses Borders

International • Intercultural • Interracial Dating

Safe and Successful Online Dating

Helpful Hints for Safe Online Dating

So you have decided to take the big scary plunge to begin searching for a life partner on the internet, scary right? Not really, every year hundreds of thousands of people take that same plunge and a large percentage of persons are successful in meeting the right one. Most people actually will go on to have a trouble-free dating experience, but making you aware that there all also potential dangerous situations involved is our job here as well at LoveCrossesBorders. We urge you to please take the time to read through our Dating Safety tips to ensure that your experience here is not only a happy one but also safe.

 

 

Online

Starting from Scratch

  • Keep your passwords confidential and make sure they are not easy to guess.
  • It might be a good idea to set up an email account just for online dating usage. This makes it much easier to sort through any unwanted mail.
  • Never include your personal contact information in your profile, telephone numbers, email, and especially home or work address.  This list also should include your real last name, it is for your own safety.
  • Love Crosses Borders allows you to remain anonymous to other users until you feel ready to provide contact information to other users. We offer means of communication on the site, so you can communicate with your potential partners without having to disclose personal contact information or your email address

 

Stay clear of Trouble

  • Ask a lot of questions when communicating and be alert for inconsistencies or requests for money. Make notes if you are suspicious of anything.
  • If you are suspicious of a person or if someone asks you for money, use common sense and then report the situation to us by using the "Report" button located on the member's profile or by using the online support request form.
  • For silver and gold members we do validate the profile picture and/or the identity of a member. If done so, this will be shown in the members profile. Please be aware that both procedures do not give a 100% guarantee that the information is accurate or true. Scammers may use fake, stolen or downloaded pictures. We are not doing “background checks”. Also, even if the information given by the person is true, this is no guarantee that the person is a good person or not aggressive or a scammer, etc. There is no mechanism to ensure this. So please always be very careful when dating.
  • We do not validate the information that members submit on a profile. Although we take steps to eliminate any suspect members, it is not possible to be 100% sure that all members will be honest and truthful with the information they give and in their dealings with other members. Be alert and use common sense when communicating with other members.
  • NEVER send money to anyone who you met online, but have not yet met in person.

 

Before you meet

  • Find out as much as possible about the person you are communicating with before you meet them in person. Communicate extensively using messaging or chat or email prior to calling the other person. Do not disclose your phone number or personal contact information until you feel comfortable to do so.
  • Try to request multiple photos of the person you are communicating with. Ask to see photos of the person in a variety of situations and at different times in their life. This helps to 'paint a picture' of the person and can be useful to understand more about that person.

 

 

Offline

While dating

  • Meet in a public place
    This will decrease the chances of being put in an unsafe situation, and other people may also remember you being in that location should something happen to you.
  • Tell someone about it
    Tell a friend or family member where you are going, when you intend to return, and how to reach you
  • Bring a friend
    You can bring a friend, especially if you are going to a place where you don't know anyone else. That way, you can help keep each other in check.
  • Use your own transportation
    Either take your own car, or take public transportation or a taxi, so you don't have to rely on the person you are dating to get home. Also, that way the person won't know your address.
  • Don't leave your drink or food unattended
    There are, sometimes odorless and/or colorless, substances and so called “date rape drugs” that can make you disoriented or unconscious. These effects are usually exacerbated when alcohol is involved.
    So, don't accept a drink or food from your date unless you open it yourself or watch it being prepared.
  • Limit Your Alcohol Intake
    Alcohol impairs your judgment. This is why avoiding alcohol on first dates is a good idea, and limiting your intake is a safe bet for the first few encounters at the very least.
  • Bring extra money
    Always carry enough cash to be able to pay your own bill and take a cab if the date goes wrong.
  • Arm yourself
    pepper spray or Mace in your purse when you go on a first date can help if he gets too grabby or tries to attack you

 

 

General advice

  • Take your time to get to know the person. Proceed one step at a time and at your own pace.
  • If dating a person located in a foreign country be aware of cultural differences and take the time to learn the culture and understand the other person’s expectations about the relationship. Spend as much time together as is possible getting to know the person, don't just rely on email and instant messaging.
  • Investing additional time to get to know the person before things get serious will help you to avoid costly mistakes.

 

 

Spam and Scam

  • Spam is referring to unsolicited bulk messages, especially advertising.
    If you’re being spammed by someone you met on Love Crosses Borders cease contact and report the behavior as inappropriate.
  • Scam is also called “confidence trick” and is an attempt to defraud a person after first gaining the person’s confidence and is usually based on exploiting characteristics of the human psyche such as honesty, dishonesty, vanity, compassion, credulity, irresponsibility, naïveté, or greed.
    There are many different variations of scams in the field of online dating. Scammer may post fake profiles, befriend other members and manipulate them with the aim of getting money from the victim.
    In some cases scammers might even steal your personal details and use your identity to fraud other members.
    We do have checks in place in an attempt to verify the legitimacy of member's profiles but scammers can still slip through, for example by using fake profiles and/or stolen or downloaded pictures.
    The golden rule concerning scam is: NEVER SEND MONEY TO SOMEONE YOU HAVE MET ONLINE.

 

 

Before you become engaged

  • Each year hundreds of people on our website meet their spouse and live a happy, loving life together. Before you get engaged, take the time to consider what could go wrong and know your rights.
  • Getting married is one of the most important decisions in your life and not something that should be rushed.
  • Make sure that you know as much as possible about your partner before getting engaged.
  • Get to know your partner's friends and family, in some countries when you marry someone you also "marry" their family.
  • If you are getting engaged to someone from another country then you should take additional steps to familiarize yourself with your rights regarding domestic violence, abuse and divorce in your partner’s country. Many countries including the USA, Australia, etc. have laws that protect the visa status of foreign women who are unfortunate to marry or become engaged to an abusive or violent partner. This means that you can usually seek help for problems related to domestic violence while maintaining your legal right to remain in the country.
  • In the event of divorce courts in many countries such as the USA, UK, Australia, etc. will consider the equitable distribution of all marital assets based on a variety of factors. You should therefore consider how you may be affected in the event of divorce.

 

 

Links to other resources about dating safety: